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If healing professionals want to have clients use any tools, prescriptions or advice that requires follow through and persistence, a person must first love themselves. The need to love oneself must to be acknowledged, secondly the reason why this is so important needs to be understood, and finally the challenge of loving “self” requires people to create a supportive environment. Since people have a problem loving themselves, simply telling them to love themselves is totally useless.

The good news is based on almost 30  years of clinical work that, although it often is preceded by an initial sadness, it makes people feel really good when they are invited to start talking about loving themselves. Most people sense that they do not love themselves enough, but they have never been given permission or the explanation as to why they deserve it without earning it. So just having loving “self” as a topic begins to break open the sense of being trapped in a malnourished, unsatisfying relationship with “self” and generally, others. (audio/video)